Who Is Moe?

Outside of Maryland, the political world is riveted by the most unpredictable Presidential primary season in a generation. 

Will Clinton or Obama gain the upper hand coming out of today’s Super Tuesday primary – heading into the first relevant Maryland primary in years? 

Will McCain put Romney away – or will the conservative think-tank/talk-radio-industrial-complex figure out a way to take out its longtime antagonist?

But here in Maryland – in the 1^st Congressional District – we are being treated to a different spectacle, which seemingly seeks to answer the question: Who is Moe?

Three candidates.  Three bitter rivals.  Three men intent on knocking the other two guys’ heads together.  In other words: Three Stooges.

Gilchrest and Pipkin are liberal peas in a pod.  No wait… Harris and Pipkin are big spending liberals.  But hold on… Gilchrest and Harris are secretly harboring illegal immigrants and giving them college scholarships.  And so is Pipkin… maybe… you never know.  

 And the Club for Growth – which Mike Huckabee (who is either a right-winger or a liberal, depending on who is paying for the ad) calls the Club for Greed – really doesn’t like Wayne Gilchrest.  They like Andy Harris – but they aren’t allowed to say so in their commercials.

So, we have candidates with very limited name recognition spending hundreds of thousands of dollars broadcasting their opponents’ names and faces.  The guy who paid for the peas in the pod ad only appears in it for about 5 seconds – while his opponents get 25 seconds of air time.

Head knocking.  Negativity.  And illegal immigrants.  Oh, and Pipkin thinks Andy Harris looks kinda goofy in a Hawaiian shirt.  That’s what this campaign seems to be about. 

Next week, whoever knocks the other two heads together the hardest gets to be Moe.  But you have to wonder: Can even the smartest of the Three Stooges rebuild a bankrupt state political party?